One Plus

One is such a pleasant, round number name. The numeral is simple and straight. You could imagine it pointing upward with the little flag at the top. 1. It’s the beginning; all else builds from there. One step then another. One breath every five to ten seconds. Zero may begin the Fibonacci sequence (0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8 etc) but the One is what begins the quickly expanding value. By round twenty of adding the two previous numbers, you reach 4081.

As I write this, I’m humming One is the Loneliest Number. Three Dog Night made it a super hit, but the version recorded by creator Harry Nillson is worth a listen. As much as I love Nillson’s music, I disagree with his sentiment.

There can be beauty and peace found in solitude. Maybe I can say this because I am not always alone, and my extrovert tendencies regard strangers on the street as temporary friends.

I’m shifting my focus in my quest to end the friend drought that began with a cross-state move; a repeat of what I experienced nearly a decade ago when one by one my art and music buddies moved away. It took a while, but one by one (there is that number again) I met people through work and volunteering. Those strangers quickly became more than temporary friends. By the time I moved away I could count a handful of different groups of the music, art, happy hour and neighborhood social variety. It is one of the reasons I held out so long before agreeing to leave my beloved town.

It hasn’t taken long for my current home to become beloved. The house, sure. The proximity to one daughter’s family, of course. The surprise has been the bounty of cultural, musical and art activities that could potentially fill each week to bursting. Despite leaving a neighborhood of friends that I adored and missing a church home that surpassed any I’d been involved in previously, I feel more connected to and in synch with this new hometown than ever before.

One of the many local museums hosts a Second Thursday Happy Hour. Cocktails and snacks are available for purchase, but the event is free. As I roamed this new-to-me space, the harmonic tones of a girl and her guitar wafted through the halls. My heart filled with art-love and people-love and maybe self-love as I realized I don’t need a buddy. I still would love to meet that friend that will go and do at the drop of a text, but I can enjoy on my own, too.

Red Cannas, 1927; Georgia O’Keefe, Amon Carter Museum

I can be my One Plus.

Going solo adds a level of freedom. There is no wondering if the other person is bored and wants to move on. No need to discuss the art, except within your own curious mind. I celebrate the joy of going solo as I embrace the number one.

Recent discussions have trended toward the benefits of traveling solo. I admire women who think nothing of planning an excursion on their own. Challenges may arise but they meet them and move on to the next big adventure. I met the mayor (of the Garment District in Manhattan) when I traveled there solo. Lacking a companion, I enjoyed a conversation with a stranger. Even more recently I was tempted to sit with a lovely man teaching chess in the park, especially when he told me he grants wishes, but I had to hurry along to catch up with my co-travelers. There is discovery, adventure and fun to be found in going solo. One Plus.

Going solo to museum events provides opportunities to meet lovers of all cultural outings. Discussions about the local music scene have led to some number sharing with a hope that we will text about future concerts. It may never happen and that’s okay because while I am not as likely to attend a music event solo, my One Plus status may just lead me there.

Sometimes my One Plus becomes a bonus one plus one when my hubby joins me. Another museum hosts a happy hour before screening a new film on the first Fridays. Movie tickets are reasonable as are the prices for drinks or snacks. On the night of our introduction to this new-to-me museum, we watched A Private Life with Jodie Foster. I highly recommend it. This new film is in French with subtitles, but you hardly notice the need to read as you follow the story line and tangled web of relationships between the characters. I can’t wait for the next opportunity to attend, as one or two. Either way, it will be a plus.

Years turn over on the calendar. Situations, even domiciles, change. Attitudes should shift along with adjustments. Magic happens when we are open to new realities, welcoming new adventures. Past experience has shown me how being open to new things welcomes success. Just watch, as I release the “need” for a culture-buddy, I’ll begin to meet them while enjoying the pleasure of my own company. I can’t wait. In the meantime, I will celebrate One Plus.